The One Great Change in My Life!


By Ralph Masengill Jr.


Ralph Masengill Jr. shares his incredible story on the one great change in his life, and how it led to his personal happiness and success as a change agent, on Big Blend Radio.


We have all made changes in our lives. The truth is we change 24 hours a day and 7 days a week if for no other reason than all change is constant. Change is always going on in and around us. However most of us have a certain change or changes that have made a greater impact than others. I know that I do.

I want to tell you the true story of the greatest change in my life. This change has literally changed me by almost 180 degrees. It has without any doubt saved my life and has allowed me to have a happy and fruitful tenure on this earth. Let me tell you a true story about myself. I hope my story will show you how far some people will go not change their attitude. One of the goals in my book is to learn how to embrace positive change and not resist it. Here is an example of my resistance to change because of a bad attitude and what happened because of it.

Some forty plus years ago I was doing very well. I had a great family, a good business position and the opportunity for that to grow and prosper. I had made some excellent connections in the political world and life was good.

According to society’s score card I was living the American Dream. I was doing well. In my mind I was doing very well. However, the real story was I was miserable. No matter how many toys I bought myself or how many business successes came my way I always felt empty, and I could not figure out why. After all, look at all I had.

By some score cards I was indeed doing very well. If all that is true why was I not happy? Somehow I knew there had to be more to life than the misery I was living in. But instead of facing my unhappiness head on and making appropriate change; I followed the path of most self-centered people and that was the path of least resistance. I followed what society said was best for me and, I paid the price. Ego and arrogance are strong motivators, and we must learn to not listen to them. At this time in my life I was studying change on an academic basis but failed to see the obvious connection. I continued doing the same thing expecting my happiness to improve; it did not. Some of you may recognize that what I was doing is the definition of insanity. My life was a disaster. I was very miserable.

I ran to alcohol to kill the pain. Rather than change I decided to work on one of the symptoms of the problem, the pain and not the cause of the problem. I will readily admit that I knew better, but pride was in charge, and I followed it to more misery.

There was constantly a small voice saying “Ralph this is not it.” This small voice quietly and constantly told me to change. But I would not change. Change and give up the so called “good life,” not on your life. I again and again refused to change. Now I tried to drown the quiet small voice in alcohol. More and more alcohol was my solution to my misery. No matter how much I drank the voice was still there. I would not change. Things got worse and worse.

However, in the business world things were even getting better thanks to my partners. My personal and spiritual life was at absolute zero. This misery went on for over 25 years. My life was a disaster because I would not consider changing.

At one point I turned to religion to give me some relief from the mental pain and sorrow. I said religion. I did not say a relationship with a higher power. The religion I practiced was one of legalism and performance. I had no relationship with anything. I became a super hypocrite and an almost perfect Pharisee and performer.

During my “religious time,” I seldom missed church. The worse the weather the more determined I was to be there. In my arrogance and legalism I was sure my attending church would make a difference. There is nothing wrong with attending the church of your choice. However, I was there for all the wrong reasons. I had again deceived myself into thinking that I could perform my way to a happier life. Things got worse.

My attempts at “trickery” did not work which was no surprise to anyone but me. I of course did not fool God or the people of that church. In time it became clear even to me that performance and legalism were not going to make things better. In my deceived brain it was clear that God, as I knew Him at that time, was against me. I left the church.

Things got worse. Not only was I miserable inside my soul, but now things were not going well in my family and business life. My family life was a wreck. I began to miss work because of my addiction to alcohol.

I could not and would not be a good father and husband. I generally ignored my family. I could not and would not run my business correctly because of my addiction to alcohol. It was clear to me that I had to do something.

I thought a lot about what to do. I decided to take the coward’s way and drink more alcohol, and I did just that. I was out of control. I was insane.

The international definition of insanity is continuing to do the same thing and expecting a different result. Based on my actions I was a poster child, the perfect example of insanity. Here is more proof.

Things got worse because I would not consider changing. One afternoon in a drunken stupor I went to my closet and loaded a double-barreled twenty gauge shotgun.

With that loaded shotgun in my hand I sat down in a chair and took off my left shoe and sock. Then at point-blank range I aimed that shotgun at my heart and pulled the trigger with my toe. I tried to commit suicide. It almost worked. When I pulled the trigger with my toe the pull on the trigger made my aim a little off. Instead of hitting my heart I blew my midsection apart. It was a serious injury. I was not expected to live. I was rushed to the hospital forty miles away and was on the operating table for over six hours. I was in intensive care for a week and then moved into a regular room for two weeks.

One afternoon at the hospital a group of five or six doctors came into my room, and the lead doctor said, “Mr. Masengill, you are a medical miracle.” “What do you mean?” I asked. He said, “First of all the number eight shell you used was old and contained rust and dirt. There was a one hundred percent chance of infection. You do not have an infection. We have double-checked, and you are infection free. Ralph, that is amazing,” the lead doctor continued. “You were shot at point-blank range with a twenty gauge number eight shell. Ralph, do you know how powerful the force is behind that kind of shell? Are you aware of the kind of pattern a number eight shell makes at point blank range? Are you aware of how many pellets are in a number eight shell?”

The lead doctor continued, “Mr. Masengill, not a single pellet shot hit any vital organ. Not one pellet hit either kidney. None hit your spine or your spinal cord. They all completely missed your liver, your spleen and your stomach. One hundred percent of the shot landed only in your intestinal track. We did some calculations and we estimated that even if we welded that shotgun to a steel tripod and froze your body in solid ice, we do not believe it would be possible to miss all your organs with a point-blank twenty gauge number eight shell. We believe that there would be only a million-to-one probability of success. The truth is most of us do not believe that kind of shot is possible. Yet you did it without trying. It is truly amazing. If there are such things as miracles, this is one of them.

When I came home from the hospital I was still ungrateful for my life being spared. I continued to drink for another two months. At that point I began to listen to that quiet consistent voice, and I entered an alcohol treatment program. That is where I connected with my spiritual side and developed my new attitude. All this took place over forty years ago. From that day until this I have been totally alcohol free and I began to enjoy a life of peace, joy and true success. I have even lost my compulsion to drink alcohol.

Today I have a wonderful family with a beautiful wife and four grown children, seven grandchildren, one cat we call Bandit, and two dogs, Beau and Charlie. My business successes have been substantial and far better than before the fall. I am a truly blessed person, and I am very grateful for all the things that have happened in my life both good and bad. What a wonderful thing it is to live in love, peace and joy. Again I am grateful for a second chance. After years working with others who have been addicted to alcohol as I was, I know how rare a second chance truly is in today’s world, and I am now indeed grateful.

I got a second chance because I finally took a calculated risk and embraced positive change. I know from personal experience what can happen if you do not take the risk and if you do embrace positive change. I learned the hard way that it is necessary to take calculated risks and embrace positive change. You can learn from my many mistakes and not go through all the misery.


Ralph Masengill Jr. is a best-selling author and award-winning advisor, coach, marketing expert, business consultant and public relations strategist. His latest, and ‘must-read’ book is “Conquer Change and Win: An Easy-to-Read Fun Book on the Serious Subject of Change.”




Print Friendly, PDF & Email

About the Author:

Ralph Masengill Jr. is a best-selling author and award-winning advisor, coach, marketing expert, business consultant and public relations strategist. His latest, and ‘must-read’ book is “Conquer Change and Win: An Easy-to-Read Fun Book on the Serious Subject of Change.”

Website Link Visit Link Here
Category , ,
No Feedback Received